My Leap of Faith
It was a difficult stunt already, and this time I had to do it in front of 42,000 people during the final of the March Madness Tournament. It was one of the scariest moments I had as a college cheerleader. A tuck-basket-toss involves four teammates throwing me in the air while I do a backflip. If I flipped too soon, the stunt would land short, and I would fall on my face in front of the crowd and on national TV. It felt impossible, but when the moment came my teammates threw me as hard as they could, and I flipped the highest I ever had at the exact right moment.
Then on the morning of Oct. 27, 2018, another seemingly impossible moment came as millions of Americans watched me and my community. An anti-Semitic gunman shot and killed 11 people inside the Tree of Life synagogue in Pittsburgh鈥攁 place that has become my city and where the Jewish students at the University of Pittsburgh have become my people.
When I accepted the position to be a 黑料传送门聽Springboard Fellow聽at the聽聽in the spring of 2017, I had no idea what was ahead of me. The program places young, aspiring professionals on campuses across the country to create innovative programming for Jewish college students.聽When聽Hillel chose me, I wasn鈥檛 sure why. I鈥檓 not planning to become a rabbi and I don鈥檛 possess a degree in Jewish studies. My聽college experiences were filled with聽classes in elementary education,聽cheerleading at basketball games and sorority events.
The morning that the Tree of Life tragedy occurred, all I wanted to do was stay in my apartment and hide. But I thought of my supportive, professional team 黑料传送门 and the dozens of students who were headed there in that moment to see us. This was a tuck-basket-toss moment. The Jewish community of Pittsburgh was in the spotlight, and it was time to go.
I rushed onto campus. As familiar faces walked past, I ran to hug them. Some students wanted to talk, and others didn鈥檛 need any words. These were powerful moments. Moments when we just looked at one another from across Schenley Quad, ran to each other and knew the other鈥檚 thoughts. Later, I stood outside the student union with a blue poster that read 鈥淪trength Board鈥 for people to sign. All students, regardless of their faith identity or background, were welcome to show their support.
鈥淭his is like 9/11, but for the Jewish people,鈥 one student said. 鈥淚鈥檓 scared we鈥檙e next,鈥 another student mumbled with fear. 鈥淎re we safe celebrating Shabbat?鈥 asked a third. The truth was, I had many of the same thoughts, but I couldn鈥檛 let it show. I, too, was struggling to understand this event as a Jew.
Every single student I spoke to shared their feelings and then immediately told me their action plan for moving forward to help their community heal. The Jewish students in fraternities and sororities tabled outside the student union offering cards for students to sign that would be sent to the Tree of Life synagogue. Hillel鈥檚 鈥淐hallah for Hunger鈥 recruited 230 student volunteers during the week following the tragedy to bake 575 loaves of challah to send to Tree of Life and all over the community. 鈥淟oaves of love trump hate,鈥 one of the 鈥淐hallah for Hunger鈥 board members posted. They couldn鈥檛 be more right.
The Jewish students at Pitt don鈥檛 quit. Seeing them rise to the occasion brought light back into my life. They were showing up, and that gave me the strength to support them. I鈥檒l never forget the line of students waiting to talk to me; it included a freshman who was planning the upcoming Shabbat and a senior we hadn鈥檛 seen all semester. They were coming to me during a time of need. 鈥淚 just needed a hug,鈥 one of them said. 鈥淚 was looking for you, and I knew I could find you out here,鈥 another told me.
When I was selected to be a fellow, I was worried I wouldn鈥檛 be enough. But I realize now that I was meant to be a here; I was meant to work with these students at this exact moment. To flip higher than I ever have before. G-d brought me to the Steel City for them, and because of my students, I am no longer afraid.